Friday, April 8, 2011

WHO YOU ARE



I've been thinking alot about this lately and let me first just flat out say that this has nothing to do with any of my children or their spouses.  Ok, now that that is out of the way, on with my musings.

Have you ever looked at yourself and said, "This is not who I want to be"?  I think we all have good aspirations of wanting to be good people.  And who knows, maybe there are people out there who aspire to be bad people.  But basically, I at least, have a desire to be a good person.

 I do have some habits that I need to work on.  One bad habit that I quite enjoy, is saying the word, "hell".  I usually say in in the context: "What the hell?"  Amber said she even saw a tee-shirt one time that said that.  I told her if she ever saw it in my size to buy it and I'd at least wear it for a lounge shirt.  See how bad I am?  In fact, I'm so bad, that I sincerely doubt if I can ever take that word out of my personal language.  But rest assured that I am trying to take other words out.  Oh wait, except for the word, "crap".   I really do need to work on that one.  If I take "crap" out of my language, can I keep, "hell"? 

Another thing that I have tried to work on and continue to work on is patience.  One time I was a Young Women's counselor and was working on my Young Women's Medallion as a leader.  One of the goals I chose to do was to pick a virtue (I picked patience), look it up in the Topical Guide and read all the scriptures on it, then pick one of the scriptures, memorize it, and then work on it in your life.  The scripture I picked was in the Doctrine and Covenants:  "Have patience in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days." (D&C 24:8)  I thought a lot about it before I picked a patience.  I finally decided on patience, because I figured that patience really encompassed the rest of the virtures, if you were patient enough.  Sometimes I find myself not being so patient.  I say to myself, "Wait, is this the person you want to be?  Didn't you want to be a patient person?"  And then I try to get back to that  patient person that I want to be.

One thing that has been bothering me recently is gossip.  And see, here again I can make excuses and say that family gossip is one thing and gossiping about friends and acquaintances is another. I guess what I'm really saying is, I'll work on one thing at a time. :0)  More than a few times recently, I have found myself with a group of women who start gossiping about someone.  And more than a few times I join right in with them. And then I have to stop and ask myself, "Is this who you want to be?"  I think there is a fine line between just talking about someone, such as, "Did you hear about so-and-so" and gossip.  A lot of times we are passing information to each other.  In my opinion, that is not gossiping.  I think it is gossiping, when it turns malicious or ugly, or maybe even when you're complaining about that person, and enjoying it a bit too much. This is one thing that I am thinking a lot about lately, and it is something I have decided to work a bit harder on, because I do know that I do not want to be this kind of person.  I've kind of adopted this saying as my motto in this subject:  Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you - not because they are nice, but because you are.” – Author Unknown.  Maybe it should read, "Treat everyone with kindness, even with those who are rude - not because they are nice, but because you want to be. " 

Just know, I'm working on it.......

Who are you?  Who do you want to be?

8 comments:

Delirious said...

I've actually had some of these same thoughts lately. I've been reminding myself that I want to be christlike. It's hard to remember that in the moment, but later I kick myself for not acting consistently with that goal. I keep thinking of this scripture:
" Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is." 1 John 3:2
I hope that when He appears, I will be like Him. And I really think that's closer than we think. The second coming may not happen yet, but looking at my life, I see how fast it goes by!

Lindsay Logic said...

When we were at my Grandma H's funeral, one of the speakers told a cute story. She said that there was a group of quilters, and every time the conversation started to get gossip-y about someone, Grandma would look at her thread and say, "You know, they just don't make thread like they used to." and it would turn the conversation. I've thought about that a lot since then. I listen to a lot of gossip, but I'm trying not to be a gossiper. :))

Mr. Giggles said...

Or...if people start gossiping around you, you could just say, "What the Crap!"

Stick said...

I have been trying to change some things like this about myself as well. Wish us both luck. BTW, the rose in this picture is just the color of that Becca has chosen for one of her two wedding colors. The other is sort of a royal navy, does that make sense?

Inklings said...

Great blog - I feel the same way. And I try not to swear, but I am not sure I can give up the word "bitch." How bad is that???

Stef said...

Ha. I just found your blog. (I am in your ward...joining from the old Ventana ward). This post definitely got me to thinking. If I could see what kind of person I was to other people say my children, would I like that? And why is change so hard?
Sigh, oh hell, all we can do is try. What? Oh, crap! I didn't mean to say that....gulp!

Nene said...

Welcome, Stef! Glad you found me! :0) Thanks for your comments.

Twist said...

Joseph Smith once said that the closer a person gets to God, the more aware they are of their imperfections...the little ones. As long as you are aware of faults and working on them, you're in good shape. I know I always admire who you are and what you do. Love you, Sis